Wierd American Laws (Califonia)

Animals are banned from mating publicly within 1,500 feet of a tavern, school, or place of worship. Like to see them enforce this with rats and cockroaches
It is a misdemeanor to shoot at any kind of game from a moving vehicle, unless the target is a whale. How many whales live in Cali ... oh never mind
No vehicle without a driver may exceed 60 miles per hour. But a vehicle with a driver can exceed 60?
Many animals are illegal to own as pets, including snails, sloths, and elephants. Where on earth would you keep an elephant anyway?
Nobody is allowed to ride a bicycle in a swimming pool. But a skateboard or rollerblades are ok
It is illegal for a man to beat his wife with a strap wider than 2 inches without her consent. But his fist is ok?
It is illegal to cry on the witness stand. Any children testifying have gotta be strong
Molesting butterflies can result in a $500 fine. How do you molest a butterfly?
It is illegal for a secretary to be alone in a room with her boss. No working late in the office excuses eh?
One may not carry a lunch down the street between 11 and 1 o'clock. How do you take a lunch break?
Persons classified as "ugly" may not walk down any street. That explains the whale law then
It is illegal to pile horse manure more than six feet high on a street corner. The middle of the freeway is fine though