A blonde's year review

January - Took new scarf back to store because it was too tight.

February - Fired from pharmacy job for failing to print labels ... Helllloooo!!! ... Bottles won't fit in typewriter!!!

March - Got really excited... finished jigsaw puzzle in 6 months ... box said "2-4 years!"

April - Trapped on escalator for hours ... power went out!!!

May - Tried to make Kool-Aid... wrong instructions ... 8 cups of water won't fit into those little packets!!!

June - Tried to go water skiing ... couldn't find a lake with a slope.

July - Lost breaststroke swimming competition ... learned later, the other swimmers cheated, they used their arms!!!

August - Got locked out of my car in rainstorm ... car swamped because soft-top was open.

September - The capital of California is "C" ... isn't it???

October - Hate M &M's ... they are so hard to peel.

November - Baked turkey for 4 1/2 days ... instructions said 1 hour per pound and I weigh 108!!!

December - Couldn't call 911 ... "Duh" ... there's no "eleven" button on the stupid phone!!!

What a year!!