Sly bastard

An elderly man in Penang called his son in Hong Kong and said, "I hate to ruin your day, but I have to tell you that your mother and I are divorcing; forty-five years of misery is enough."

"Pop, what are you talking about?" the son screamed.

"We can't stand the sight of each other any longer," the old man said. "We're sick of each other, and I'm sick of talking about this, so you call your sister in Canberra and tell her," and he hung up.

Frantic, the son called his sister, who exploded on the phone.

"Like heck they're getting divorced," she shouted, "I'll take care of this."

She called her dad immediately, and screamed at the old man, "You are NOT getting divorced! Don't do a single thing until I get there. I'm calling my brother back, and we'll both be there tomorrow. Until then, don't do a thing, DO YOU HEAR ME?" and hung up.

The old man hung up his phone and turned to his wife.

"Okay," he said, "they're coming for the reunion dinner and Lunar New Year and paying their own airfares."